How I Own God

I own God. Finally. And it has not been easy. Let me explain. It all started about 40 years ago when I asked my all knowing Dad ‚”who made God”? His answer to that question started me on a life long expedition of search, a inquiry to see if my Dad’s answer was right. “God was not made”, he said. “He always existed”. At 7 years old that was intense. At 47 it remains even more so.

“How is it possible that God was always here”, was my levelheaded response. And at that moment he introduced me to the word, infinite and in its other form, infinity. He explained it by telling me to look up into the evening sky, and find the furthest star and then to imagine that there was another star just like that beyond that and another one beyond that there was ALWAYS another star beyond the furthest one. With that, I left the issue alone having a distraught yet inquisitional look and feeling.

The existence of God for me growing up was in the form of Sunday School and Church. Unlike in today’s world, with competitive school events, travel clubs, and 7 day a week activities, our Church was central in our lives. But church was not God for me. It was just church. Growing up Methodist, I basically was introduced to a traditional routinized effort to be a good person, read the Bible, get saved by Jesus and passing the offering plate. I must have accepted Jesus 100 times ( especially when I was in trouble! ) But still no God for me. Father, Son, Holy Spirit really never just made too much sense.

To please my parents and marry, I attended a religious College. Surely I would obtain God there! I signed a contract agreeing not to drink, smoke, dance, chew or screw. Surely by obeying such seemingly ridiculous laws would lead me to the God that still existed somewhere beyond the stars? No. If anything, it made me want to stop my quest. Can people be that close to something that they can’t see, touch, feel, smell? I wanted proof!

My 30’s were filled with work, fun, rebellion and my dream to be familiar with, let alone owning God became less important. That is, until my first son was born. 7 years and $70,000 of medical bills later. I witnessed my first true Godly miracle. Or was that just high tech Science at its finest. 3 months later after just 7 minutes and a $7.00 bottle of wine, second son was well on his way to join brother as Irish Twins. Would miracle two joined with miracle three, my daughters birth 2 years later, secure my God Quest?

I realized that to know, understand and eventually take ownership of God, I must educate myself more, think out of the box. Get out of the product of your environment mentality and start reading. I went to Puerto Rico for a Mission Trip, to help those less fortunate than myself and I had a Godly experience but I was still looking at the stars at night thinking I was just not aboard the right train to God.

So, now in my early forties, my dear wife laughed when I walked in the door with The Complete Idiots Guide to Understanding The Koran, Understanding Buddhism, Understanding Mormonism, Understanding Christianity etc. Deep reading. Whacky stuff, and confirmation that society depended upon a higher power to just survive life. How can there be so many Gods for so many nations?

Giving up on the traditional stuff, I thought it was time to bring Science into the picture. After all, I wanted proof right? I look around my office and see the amazing collection of books, audio tapes and videos that helped me make sense of it all and how to know God. And at 47 years old, I finally had my “ah ah” moment and realized that I not only had found God and I experienced the power of God – so much, that I bought into God. I Own God. The good news is so can you. You just need to figure it out like I did. Hint: you don’t have to look up.